![]() I may never have a rotating closet, but it was possible that one day I’d find real friends and might learn to accept that not having it all figured out-including your sexuality-was okay. But I was seduced by the thought that Empire Records could actually become my reality. The world created in most teen films is so unbelievable I still watched those other films wanting to be displaced, wanting to live in those environments with parent-free pool parties and fashionable friends. Films like Clueless, Mean Girls and Jawbreaker showed me affluent, well-dressed, popular friends, who in the end didn’t have any real problems (aside from being an accidental murderer once). Sure, other movies, from every generation, have female BFFs, but those girls often always had everything. To me, it was these two broken girls and their friendship that bought all the rest of the misfits together. In the end, Corey and Gina make up at Deb’s “funeral,” and it encourages the rest of the crew to create a more powerful bond. I wanted her to hold my hand because she felt broken sometimes too. I craved the kind of friendship where a girl wouldn’t run away or block me on AIM because she found out that I cried at night because I couldn’t figure out what was “wrong” with me. I needed them to chalk this up to messy circumstances, talk about it, and let it strengthen their friendship. There may have been no overt queer factor present in the film, but I found it anyways in this scene. They laid their hurt on the table but it was unclear if their friendship would or could survive it. Ones in which you not only discover their cute quirks but where you may learn about a painful past.Ĭorey and Gina’s explosive fight scene-during which Corey’s addiction to amphetamines is revealed and Gina exposes her jealousy and family problems-rocked me. I’m not saying that I would purposely befriend girls I had crushes on in the hopes we’d end up together, but I was invested in the notion that Empire Records first suggested to me: that the strongest relationships are those that evolve from friendships. Partially because of the film’s influence, I started attaching queerness to friendships-most of my romantic relationships since started as platonic ones. I even pictured myself giggling with a girl in the front seat and singing loudly off-key once I got old enough to drive, just like Corey and Gina at the start of Empire Records. I craved holding hands or linking arms with a girl while walking through the mall. I wanted to be the girl at the sleepover who offered the shoulder to cry on. Whenever I imagined being with girls, friendship was the base of the relationship. Heikkinen says that she never developed the characters with a queer relationship in mind, but Corey and Gina’s connection is what captivated me most. Instead, what I was looking for in films were friends, a crew outside of my family to talk to and dissect things like, “If I love Devon Sawa, why am I always thinking about kissing girls?” I loved my IRL family-they were the people who paid all my Blockbuster late fees, after all-but bringing up my feelings towards girls at the weekly family meeting just wasn’t going to happen. I knew something about my sexuality was different, but because I couldn’t fully pin it down-couldn’t fully define it or acknowledge it-I didn’t seek out films explicitly about LGBTQ+ topics and characters. I wasn’t actively “looking for myself” in movies back then I was mostly looking to escape reality, especially when it came to understanding my queer identity. A group that resembled the type of chosen family I desperately wanted in the future. Nevertheless, the film went on to achieve cult status thanks to misfits like me who found comfort in the coworkers who became a close-knit group of trauma-bonded homies. ![]() But the film was a box office disappointment, making just over $150,000 on opening weekend, and it was overwhelmingly panned by critics (Roger Ebert called it a “lost cause,” awarding it just 1.5 stars). Directed by Allan Moyle, the film starred a crop of promising fresh faces including Renée Zellweger, Liv Tyler, and Debi Mazar. The plan to save it hatched by slacker employee Lucas (Rory Cochrane) backfires, and the rest of the employees must band together to help the store and-as trite as it sounds-wind up rescuing each other in the process. Released on September 22, 1995, the dramedy takes place during one workday at a beloved indie record store under threat of going corporate.
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